FreeHeart
Right now, i am feeling like a freeman. As if something has been lifted from my heart and i am no longer tied down by feelings and emotions and longing for.I feel like the old Kelvin again.Like how no one can affect my emotions again.
I have never been so frank with anyone before.Was sitting there watching TV with you. But like old times, i don't speak well and so this special way of talking with you.I meant every single word i said. And this is something i won't regret. Come on, its human nature to love and yearn to be loved. But its the power of Kelvin to believe in rational acts over emotions.Like i told you, i dream of having a future with you but i do not want to be bound by the harshness of present circumstances. Thats why i won't jio you. I want to be with you but not now. IN the future, maybe?I won't stay single and wait. Haha come on thats not me.Because knowing you, the next time you come back, you will be attached already-too easily swayed. Trust me. For the third time. What i say always comes true.What i want seems unrealistic but its rational. Think about it.And. At the same time, you know full well that i will welcome you into a romantic realm in my life at anytime. Why do i dare to say that? Because you of all people know that we together will make a great couple. Because lasting romance is always based upon strong friendship. Think about that as well.
But really something i want to say and i hope you understand. First impression of gerard and already i don't really like him.Think from a guy's perspective for once. Considering our strong bond and the amount we have gone through. And considering what i think about him.I really won't feel good knowing that you actually fell for him. Hmm... Like i guessed, spending time alone in a foreign land with a guy works magic. Just like newly weds. Sweet, wonderful and no responsibilities.Well its your choice in the the path of life and i being myself will not intervene. As you know me, I don't like to poke into other peoples business.
Soon, it will be back to the days of not having shuqi around.Well, guojun just helped me explain why i suddenly feel so free again. Because there will be no more emotional strains on me. No more thinking of scenarios.Whao, i feel damn powerful now. Feeling all great even though i know that someone i love is happily spending everyday with her lover which i do not like. Arrh yes...the feeling of being me again.Yup, thats 2 other reasons why i won't be waiting.
As such i reveal and untold new year resolution i set on 010104 when i was at the beach with you. To get in touch with my emotions. And so i did, enjoyed the happiness of longing for, the sadness of disappointment, the anger of jealousy. And now i am back to myself. With me, the lessons i have learnt and the true emotional control that i yearn to achieve. I thank you my dearest friend(don't mind i continue to call you my dear cos you have always been).
Let me stay alone this 2 days because i will be sad when you leave. And nope i will never abandon you and i will always be there for you as it has always been. Remember what i told you and trust me. Well but should you end up like another weisong, haha, i won't be like reuben. Because i have told told you thats its foolish to act that way. Such will only show that you either can't trust or can't learn. Hmm, thats what makes Kelvin stand out from the crowd.
Ok, goodbye again and take care. Remember my last 3 spoken words to you.
~Welcome back Kelvin~Enjoy the feast but beware the beast~
Wong just told me about how happy he is as commisioning nears. And i can feel his joy. Come on dude, stop saying that i am a good sgt. Makes me proud. And you will be a good officer.
I have never been so frank with anyone before.Was sitting there watching TV with you. But like old times, i don't speak well and so this special way of talking with you.I meant every single word i said. And this is something i won't regret. Come on, its human nature to love and yearn to be loved. But its the power of Kelvin to believe in rational acts over emotions.Like i told you, i dream of having a future with you but i do not want to be bound by the harshness of present circumstances. Thats why i won't jio you. I want to be with you but not now. IN the future, maybe?I won't stay single and wait. Haha come on thats not me.Because knowing you, the next time you come back, you will be attached already-too easily swayed. Trust me. For the third time. What i say always comes true.What i want seems unrealistic but its rational. Think about it.And. At the same time, you know full well that i will welcome you into a romantic realm in my life at anytime. Why do i dare to say that? Because you of all people know that we together will make a great couple. Because lasting romance is always based upon strong friendship. Think about that as well.
But really something i want to say and i hope you understand. First impression of gerard and already i don't really like him.Think from a guy's perspective for once. Considering our strong bond and the amount we have gone through. And considering what i think about him.I really won't feel good knowing that you actually fell for him. Hmm... Like i guessed, spending time alone in a foreign land with a guy works magic. Just like newly weds. Sweet, wonderful and no responsibilities.Well its your choice in the the path of life and i being myself will not intervene. As you know me, I don't like to poke into other peoples business.
Soon, it will be back to the days of not having shuqi around.Well, guojun just helped me explain why i suddenly feel so free again. Because there will be no more emotional strains on me. No more thinking of scenarios.Whao, i feel damn powerful now. Feeling all great even though i know that someone i love is happily spending everyday with her lover which i do not like. Arrh yes...the feeling of being me again.Yup, thats 2 other reasons why i won't be waiting.
As such i reveal and untold new year resolution i set on 010104 when i was at the beach with you. To get in touch with my emotions. And so i did, enjoyed the happiness of longing for, the sadness of disappointment, the anger of jealousy. And now i am back to myself. With me, the lessons i have learnt and the true emotional control that i yearn to achieve. I thank you my dearest friend(don't mind i continue to call you my dear cos you have always been).
Let me stay alone this 2 days because i will be sad when you leave. And nope i will never abandon you and i will always be there for you as it has always been. Remember what i told you and trust me. Well but should you end up like another weisong, haha, i won't be like reuben. Because i have told told you thats its foolish to act that way. Such will only show that you either can't trust or can't learn. Hmm, thats what makes Kelvin stand out from the crowd.
Ok, goodbye again and take care. Remember my last 3 spoken words to you.
~Welcome back Kelvin~Enjoy the feast but beware the beast~
Wong just told me about how happy he is as commisioning nears. And i can feel his joy. Come on dude, stop saying that i am a good sgt. Makes me proud. And you will be a good officer.
posted by zente @ 5:52 AM
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